was suppose to be hiatus.
but was very emotion.
today suppose to go somewhere in the morning but i was feeling tummy pain.
super guilty.

i remembered asking mummy
why we have to come here to look for ah ma?
why must we walk so long to the place?
where are we going?
isn't ah ma staying at uncle house?

but when i grew up.
i know alot of truth behind everything.
my one and only ah ma when i was born,
she was suppose to stay in my uncle house.
i always thought that because my cousin want a room of her own,
that's why she was force to move to nursing home.
But until today,
mum was saying about my aunt taking care of other people 80+ parents
she told the truth.
she mentioned that they lock ah ma outside the house door.
and it's never was ah ma fault for having a failure in eyesight because she's old.
it was never her fault for being smelly at time because she have incontinence.
it was never her fault.

I would never let anyone do that to my parents.
BECAUSE I SIMPLY DON'T LIKE PEOPLE TO ABANDON THEIR OWN KIN!
and because they do that,
i have to tell them "YOU GUYS SIMPLY NOT FILIAL"
and "YOU ARE SUCH A JERK!"
a jerk to even abandon your own parent in nursing home.
everyone is at fault.
but their fault is the most unforgiveness one.